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I don’t what have been possed me these days … It seems like my mood not so steady. I’ve been feeling kinda angry and sad, quite much these days. Seems like the ‘Dark DiaNisMe’ is in right now. You know, the one that full of anger, hate, cynical, rolled-eyes, punching the wall, throwing small things (like a pen) to the wall, sad n depressing songs, etc.
But, the thing is, I don’t… I don’t think of my music as depressing. It’s the opposite, really. You know? It… comforts me. It tells me that it’s… OK to feel sad or… scared or alone… and that I’m not alone in how I feel. And that’s part of being alive.
It’s like a rainy day; you know like Bandung these days? A rainy day makes most people… sad. OK, you’re stuck inside, it’s all gloomy – no… sunny walk in the park going on, but… I have to say, I love a rainy day. It’s just, an excuse to stay inside and drink hot tea/milk (plus gorengan). Hang out in my room or read a book or just… have a day to be alone. I don’t wanna go on a walk in the park anyway.
I don’t know what that says about me just because I find comfort in silence and a little sadness. I don’t think that makes me a morose person. I’m just more comfortable in that place.
I don’t know, maybe I’m kidding myself. But I know lots of other people that can appreciate the darker side, you know? Like,… um… Darth Vader, Peter Parker, Bruce Wayne. Or, like, you know, just tons of other fun characters…
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